CONTRIBUTED POST
When you have been with your partner for a while, you sometimes find that you’re taking advantage in one way or another. If you have children, it’s very difficult to forget where being a parent ends, and where you as a couple begin. You won’t be the only couple to hit a dry spell in your relationship. But there are things you can do to avoid complete burnout:
- Communicate – It’s one of the simplest things to do. But talking to one another about each other will help. Asking about each other’s day. Sharing your problems at work, or celebrating success with the children. Doing it together will unite you once more.
- Work through your problems – Every couple will have their issues at some point. You might not feel appreciated, or ignored maybe. Now is the time to recognize the issues and work through them.
- Rekindle the romance – Date nights and days might not seem achievable. Especially if you have a young family. But they don’t need to be anything extravagant. You could even just cook a nice meal at home when the children are in bed and switch phones and TV off.
- Think back to the beginning – If you aren’t getting on too well, it can be hard to see the good through the bad. Taking a moment to think back to the beginning of your relationship could help. Allow yourself to remember all the reasons why you fell in love in the first place. This could help you see through the bad and remember the good.
- Fall in love with you – This may seem a bit of a strange one, but if you are happy with yourself, you are happy in life. Taking some time out to look after yourself will make you feel much better, perhaps even a little sexy.
- Acceptance – There isn’t any point in wanting your partner to change. If he has always been that way, then the chances are that’s just who he is. Accepting this will make for a happier life.
- Let’s get physical – I don’t mean in the bedroom but, of course, that may help bring some closeness. I’m talking about during the day. Have you embraced your partner today? I bet the answer is no. Kisses, as they leave the house, don’t count we are talking about a hug for no reason, a kiss just because. Making this a regular thing will mean the behaviour will become more natural. You may also want to think about understanding some or the blocks you might have and this is where counselling could help.
- Shake things up a bit – We all have our schedules. The chores that need doing. The places we need to attend, but sometimes just changing things up a bit can be perfect for you as a couple. Maybe go to your child’s class together, enjoy some ice cream out. Sometimes the change can take the pressure of daily life. Giving you the opportunity to just enjoy each other’s company.
- Be realistic – Every relationship has high and low points. You have to be realistic about the journey you are on. It’s all about working on yourself once more, if you are happy, then the chances are everyone around you will be.
- Stop Worrying – If you are always focusing on the bad, then the good will float past without you even blinking an eye. When you lose the worry and the guilt. If you let go of the pressure. The chances are you will see that your partner is right there, waiting for you, to live your lives.
All the above seem like pretty small changes but can make a big difference for your relationship. You will start to see things in a whole new light, and loving yourself is a great start.